Soundtrack: “It's All Over Now, Baby Blue” by Bob Dylan
Yeah, that's right, fuck it. Fuck this thing that takes loved ones' lives and leaves us sad and yearning. I'm sick of losing people in my life, and it is only going to get worse. We are all powerless against it.
Death is a sneaky one. He comes quietly in the night some times, like a thief. Avoiding direct confrontation, just taking a person without a word. At other times he shows up early and prolongs the fact. He makes it as miserable for a person as possible, just to inject pain into the lives of those who love his victim. And every once in a while he takes someone in a blaze of glory. I used to think I wanted this last type of death, something along the lines of being electrocuted while on stage playing in front of a crowd of thousands in some huge arena. But these days I have the thought “I don't want to die alone.” I want to be surrounded by loved ones.
I am not afraid of him, though. I am not afraid to die. And I would sacrifice my life for those I love. How does that proverb go... Greater love hath no man that he lay down his life fore his friends, I think. And it is true.
Many people say that when we die we go somewhere better. That may be true, but that doesn't make it suck any less. Because it means I am just some soul, and while I am sure I'll be happier and far less angsty, it means I will be disembodied. And who wants to be a soul with no body?
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4 comments:
I hear you on all that. And almost as bad as death itself is all the stupid things people say when someone dies ... they mean well, but they don't really think about what they're saying.
I know when my grandpa died a few months back the best message I received was one that pointed to the resurrection.
Hum, just thinking about that has me all excited for 1 Corinthians 15.
What scares the living daylights out of me is this thought: what if there is no resurrection? What if this is a game, a farce? Granted, I trust and hope that it is not, but the thought of never being able to see anyone ever again in any life is a scary one.
When I go, I just want to look over at Death and say, "I'm ready." Then I'd pick up my suitcase and we'd head out the door.
That would be an awesome way to go.
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