Family Ties
Soundtrack: “Tonight, Tonight” by The Smashing Pumpkins

Today is day one of my family reunion, and I’m excited. It's the big Hast family reunion where all of the decendents of my great grandma and grandpa Hast get together and have a ridiculous amount of good times. We play a lot of horseshoes and volleyball and talk and laugh and reminisce. We’re loud and obnoxious, not in the crazy My Big Fat Greek Wedding kind of way, but in a good, friendly way. And of course, what would a German Lutheran family reunion be without the beer?! We're not drunks, but we can drink ‘em if we need to! Most of all it's about seeing people that you might not see again for another two years.

Family is very important to me. I think everyone should have a sense of where they came from– what their heritage is, who their ancestors are. I know a lot of people who hear me describe my family reunions and they can’t fathom it. They aren’t close with their family, or sometimes altogether hate their family. I don’t know where that comes from. Just fifty years ago there was a huge focus on families. People would gather in their living rooms and watch television shows like “The Lone Ranger” and “The Honeymooners” and eat their TV dinners. Very communal. These days you don’t see an emphasis on that anymore. Although there is a new sort of connection within families, with the advent of instant messenging and cellular phones. Everyone has some sort of family plan so that the 21st century family can still keep in contact despite everyone’s busy lives. I grew up within a close-knit family, and I couldn't be happier. Phooey on instant dinners and cell phones and no together time... I’ll take my old-fasioned family any day!

Clam Chowder
Soundtrack: “Climbing Up The Walls” by Radiohead

I appreciate the the men and women of the Denver Police Department are trying to keep our streets safe, I really do, but don't you think that giving someone a sobriety test because they forgot to turn their headlights on while driving on very well-lit streets in downtown Denver is a little much? Apparently not. Because tonight I was pulled over for not having my lights on. An honest mistake, our streets are very well-lit and safe. The cop asked me if I had been drinking and I told him not for a few hours. He asked me how many drinks I had and I told him two or three beers, which is what I indeed had consumed. He asked me if I had drank anything else and I told him no. So what does he do?

Mister cop thought it was funny to make me go through a sobriety check.

First off, I wasn't drunk. As I said before, I had all of three beers tonight, and I hadn't imbibed any fine alcoholic beverages in a few hours, so I was good to go. I wasn't weaving, I wasn't driving erratically, I just forgot to turn my lights on. Now, I'm not a graceful person. I have a horrible sense of balance and I'm just an all-around klutz with two left feet. On top of that I've never done that shit before so I'm nervous as hell. So I bobbled a little bit on one of the tests (the one where you hold your foot up a few inches off the ground and count until you fuck up). They let me go, of course, since I was perfectly sober, but he made it sound like I was wasted when he sent me off.

I don't usually drive, but my dad went off to go fight forest fires in California and so I have my parent's car for the weekend until my mom swaps it out for my dad's truck, which I'll have until my dad gets back from the fire, whenever that is. I haven't owned an automobile since 2003, and for good reasons. Insurance is expensive, Gasoline is ridiculously expensive, people like to drive like they total space cases, and now there's boyscout cops who like to spend their time harrassing me even though I was very clearly not drunk at all.

Other than that, I had a splendid day.

Why Don't My Doors Stay Open?
Soundtrack: “Risingson” by Massive Attack

Doors open and doors close, but it seems as though recently doors will close on me before I can even get there. Case in point: I was recently offered the Production Manager job for the CCD Community News. It wouldn't have paid much, but it would look awesome on a resume and give me plenty of experience. Now here's the catch... today I was informed by the Editor that production of the paper has been put on hold for reasons out of her control. Great. Just spiffy.

Then there are the ten million internships I've applied for. I'll get to a point where people are genuinely interested in utilizing my skills, and then completely flake out on me for no apparent reason. It's absolutely stellar for the self esteem, I'll tell you that.

I think part of the confusion that I am going through is due to having these doors slam shut in my face. I feel as though I'm recieving mixed signals in regards to the direction of my life. And it's incredibly frustrating.

Of course, there are times that I've completely dropped the ball, and I need to stop doing that. But I think it would help if I knew where the hell I am supposed to be right now.

Midlife Crisis?
Soundtrack: “Rock And Roll Suicide” by David Bowie, “Midlife Crisis” by Faith No More

I may be having a premature midlife crisis. They have a name for them, I just don't remember what it is.

Simply put, I'm not sure who I am or where I should be going. And it's a little annoying.

For my whole life I've struggled with my identity and trying to be accepted. I got over the acceptance thing by the end of my Junior year of High School. But I don't know if I've ever really known who I was.

I think the biggest problem with this is that since I don't know who I am I don't know how to relate with others. But I don't have an identity crisis, necessarily. So maybe I do know who I am, but I just won't admit it. It's entirely possible that I'm not happy with who I am, thus the confusion.

I definitely don't like where my life is right now, but I don't know what to do about it. I'm so wrapped up in trying to do so many different things right now. I'll try to buckle down and prioritize and I end up getting dragged back into everything again. I have so many interests, and I know many people who have a lot of interests, but for some reason I have a hard time balancing everything. I think it's my right-brainedness. I'm terrible at organization, even though I have all sorts of OCD tendencies.

At any rate, it's something of a perplexity for me. I have tried to take control of my life and so far it hasn't happened, and I'm worried about how this bodes for my future. I don't want to have to rely on someone else to help me take care of important matters, and I don't know if there is anyone out there who is willing to do that for me. So, I am just going to have to try harder. Hopefully one day I will prevail.

I am Giddy Beyond Belief!
Soundtrack: “Zero” by The Smashing Pumpkins

It seems as though 2007 is the ultimate year for all things sentimental about the 80's. Transformers hits next July, and Spiderman 3 is based on the classic 80's "Secret Wars" story arc that introduced Spidey's symiotic alien black costume, which eventually became Venom. Who is only the most bad ass supervillian ever.

And then yesterday I came upon this... TMNT. This is not another lame TMNT movie, kids, this is a whole new thing based on the Eastman and Laird comic books. We're talking old school. I'm so excited.

Everything Matters
Soundtrack: “Holy Diver” by Killswitch Engage

If there was any doubt that The Big Lebowski has a lot of F-bombs, this should quickly kill any such doubt so dead it cries for it's momma. Yep, it's the f***ing short version of The Big Lebowski. I would skip it if you don't like the F-bombs.

On a serious note, someone who is a wiser person than I recently said "… everything matters, it's just how much it matters to you." And it's so true. I'm finding that lately my relationships with the people that I know and love are the most important thing ever. And I have had so many friends through the years that trying to keep up with them all can be exhausting. When Joe found out on Monday that his grandfather, who isn't much older than my grandparents, has terminal cancer, my head reeled with thoughts of mortality. Not my own as I said previously, but of my friends and family. I don't know how to deal with death. I don't openly weep because when I hear that someone who I am very familiar with has died, it leaves such a void in my heart that I sometimes can't function. I just sit there in shock, looking like a fish out of water gasping for breath.

I've also been finding myself feeling increasingly sentimental in the last year and a half. I seek out old friends that I knew years ago in the hope that I can maybe renew some ties that time has broken down. And I'm not sure where it comes from. Maybe I'm just becoming a big softy. But what I cannot deny is that friends matter. More than I may even know.

No Good Can Come Of This
Soundtrack: “Last Cup Of Sorrow” by Faith No More

There's nothing like rolling into your house at about 7:30 am. Nothing in the world like it. Let's just say yesterday was a rough day. There was some good news, but there sure was a whole lot of bad news and tragedy, and I don't deal well with large amounts of that.

I did get to pick up some new music, though. The Virgin Megastore is currently having a big 80's sale, so a ton of great 80's music is on sale for $8. So I picked up The Stone Roses' self-titled disc. If none of you know who the Stone Roses are, there probably wouldn't be any alternative without them. They mastered the jangly neo-psychedelic guitar pop sound before R.E.M. was out of High School, in fact R.E.M. rips these boys off all the time. They are definitely worth checking out and much better than R.E.M.

Hidden Things No Longer Hidden
Soundtrack: “Fixation On The Darkness” by Killswitch Engage

I don't even know where to start. I guess first of all I need to apologize... I've been so busy this week that I haven't had time to touch this blog. Nevertheless, it’s been amazing.

Let's begin with the concert on Tuesday. I had a couple of extra tickets, so I invited Jen and Brandi along for A.F.I. Jen couldn’t make it, though, so Brandi’s best friend Lauren tagged along. It was an interesting night for sure. First of all, the concert itself was amazing. The crowd, however, was awful. The opening band was nothing special, a few people liked them but overall they were trying to be the Killers only not anywhere near as well-dressed. Oh well, not a big deal since I didn't spend my twenty bucks to see them. I was there for Dillinger Escape Plan and A.F.I. Nobody else.

So then Dillinger comes on, and they are amazing. The crowd was nuts, but I was having a great time. Until about halfway through the set and a buch of meathead jocks muscled their way through the crowd and started dry humping everyone. I didn't realize fucking stupid asshole jocks had good taste in music, but apparently they liked Dillinger Escape Plan enough to sexually assault everyone. And that is fucked up. Seriously. So I ended up having to watch Dillinger from behind a buch of fucking faggot ass frat boy types. Assholes. It was way better than having to endure a bunch of idiots who didn't know how to act at a concert.

So then A.F.I comes on. They do some stuff from the new album, which I'm not all that wild about, and they do some stuff from Sing The Sorrow, which I like, but what really makes me all warm and fuzzy inside is when they do the old stuff. I start singing along and going nuts. And I quickly realize that nobody around me knows what the hell they're playing.

It was tragic. Everyone loved when they played stuff like "Girl’s Not Grey" and "Miss Murder", but when they do "Despair Factor" hardly anyone knows the line "My life is a dark room... One. Big. Dark. Room." The crazy thing about that? Their fanclub is called the "Despair Faction". And not even their fan club can back them out.

But the worst moment of that night was during my favorite A.F.I. song of all time, "God Called In Sick Today". Davey Havok, the lead singer, has a deep-rooted tradition of walking across the crowd during that song. All of the hardcore A.F.I. fans know it. We're all expecting it, and when it happens, we go apeshit.

And then the crowd drops Davey Havok.

I was speechless.

Needless to say, Davey was pissed. Denver is one of A.F.I.’s favorite places to play, and yet we, the fans, disappointed them. And for that I will never forgive us, and I hope Davey does not either.

Wednesday I took it easy and worked on some graphic design projects. I think I went drinking that night, because I am pretty sure I have gone drinking about every night this week. Thursday was the same. I think. I honestly don’t remember, that is how crazy this week has been.

Friday was especially cool, I went down to Leela to hang out with friends, then I went upstairs to have a couple of beers at Tarantula Billiards. It was there than I ran into Kyle from Genesis, who was toasted. Well toasted. We talked, he drunk dialed a few people, and then I walked him down the stairs and made sure he found a cab OK. It was special. After that I drank with Benjamin and my little bro, it was good times.

Saturday was band practice for Joe’s Ordination, and it happened to be at 8:00 am. Keep in mind I had gone to the bars the previous night and I didn't get home until about 5:00 in the morning. And I had to be awake by 7:00 so I could practice. Yay. I did it, though, and it was fun.

That brings me to tonight. At noon I headed off with Anita and Joe’s "triplet", Dan, to the church to run through one last practice before the big event. At 3:00 the Ordination service started, and all in all I did pretty well. Afterwards was a reception with all sorts of goodies, and once Joe was done with all of the meet and greets, we headed off to his house to relax for a short while before meeting his parents at Old Chicago’s for some beers. An awesome end to a wonderful but very crazy week.

I've had a lot of things revealed to me this week. A lot of things pertaining to my life. And I think I am one step closer to understanding where I need to go, and how I will get there. And it is so stinkin' exciting you don't even know. Even though we may not understand the hidden things in life, we have the things that are revealed to us, and they are wonderful. It may sound corny, but the future is so bright I have to wear shades!

Fußball!
Soundtrack: Good News for People Who Love Bad News by Modest Mouse

So the World Cup has been decided, and Italy came out on top. It helped that Zizou was acting like a total ass and got himself thrown out of the game for headbutting Marco Materazzi. Even though they were responsible for eliminating Germany (a game which almost made me cry... not really), I'm glad it wasn't the French who won. A bunch of pansy prima donnas, except for Ziziou, who is an asshole prima donna.

All of this football (soccer is such a pansy term) mayhem has me jonesing to start playing the game again. And let me tell ya, I need to. Mind you, I'm not obese or anything, but when I was a kid my mom used to buy me husky jeans. I suppose you could say I'm slightly beefy. Anyway. With the amount of beer I drink and the nature of my main form of income right now (sitting in front of a computer all day designing crap), I really need to get out more. I've started riding my bike places, and I want to start rafting again. And maybe I'll get back into rock climbing... probably not right away, it's an expensive hobby.

AFI is playing the Fillmore tomorrow night. I'm so stinkin' excited because I haven't seen them in almost five years. It's gonna be awesome.

Sláinte!
Soundtrack: “Bull Takes Fighter” by Stavesacre

I have some awesome friends. Seriously. I don't think I've ever felt as close to my friends as I have lately. So to all of you, thank you. From the bottom of my heart.

Why am I so sentimental right now? I have reason to be, I guess. Me and my friends, we take care of each other. We know how to have fun, but we know when to be serious. We have good times, even when we're having tough times. On Friday night a bunch of us hit the Santa Fe Art district for the First Friday Art Walk and later on took in Potcheen Folk Band at the Irish Rover. And as always, it was good times. Much beer was consumed and great conversation was had. And the great thing is that this isn't monthly or even bi-weekly. We go do cool stuff all the freakin' time. And I love it.

And now for a little fun... according to this little survey I'm only 88% Coloradoan (pfsh... shows you how much they know). Looks like I have to buy an SUV and get a big dog in order to be "complete". I'm down with that.

How Coloradan are you?
Put an x next to everything that applies to you

[x] You've gone hiking in the mountains
[x] You've camped at least once
[x] You ride your bike more then you drive
[ ] You drive or own an SUV
[x] You can name at least 3 of colorados professional sport teams
Total=[4]

[x] You snowboard or have snowboarded before
[x] You ski or have skied before
[ ] You own a big dog
[x] You love to be outside
[x] You've seen a fox or coyote, not in the zoo
Total=[4]

[x] You've never been in a taxi cab
[x] Subway is just a sandwich restaurant
[x] You've played or seen lacrosse more then once
[x] ya'll is a weird saying
[x] You've gone white water rafting
Total=[5]

[x] You've been rock climbing
[x] You are always prepared for colorados crazy weather
[x] If you dont have a snowday at least once a year, something is wrong
[x] gas prices kill you
[x] you love the snow
Total=[5]

[x] you own a backpack
[x] You've gone sledding
[x] You've gone 4 wheeling
[x] you see at least 3 suberbans everyday
[x] you've gone dirt biking
Total=[5]

All=[20]

Now add up all of your totals and multiply by 4. That is your percentage.

V-Dub In Der Haus!
Soundtrack: “The Day I Tried To Live” by Soundgarden

Watch the Volkwagen dude drop it like it's hot...

Tomorrow is First Friday. And that means free food, free booze, and lots of really awesome art. I managed to get a bunch of people together to hit the galleries on Santa Fe, so that should be fun. Yay.

Someone Needs To Go To Their Room
Soundtrack: “Numbered Days” by Killswitch Engage

So, Korea fired a couple of rockets and now the international community is shitting their pants. And all I can think is, "Well, duh."

Seriously, I've been concerned about North Korea since High School. I don't want to sound mean or self-righteous, but the truth is that most people in the United States are completely ignorant and oblivious to what is going on around them. That's what happens you get your news from Fox News or CNN... you don't get the whole story. That's why George W. Bush is a failure as a president. He didn't get the whole story. And that is why I am scared to death right now, just like everyone else in the international community. Because my government fucked up beyond all belief. And yes, it did fuck up. We had a chance to stop this and we didn't.

It's not a hopeless situation, though. Seven governments including the United States, North Korea, South Korea, Japan, Russia, and China are in talks right now. And there's hope that a resolution will be made that will be fit for all sides.

I guess I'm just a little angry right now. We've been in Iraq for what seem like forever with no end in sight. We are losing credibility across the globe, and our government doesn't seem to care about shit that they really need to be caring about. Such as the oil crisis and the environment. Instead, George fucking Bush goes off on some damn fool crusade to save the world from Saddam Hussien and manages to get Al Quaeda even more pissed off at us.

Great.

I don't hate the president, though. I think he's made many bad decisions, but I don't hate him. I pray for him every night. I pray long and hard that he would listen to his people and follow the will of God, not his own will which he apparently thinks is divine. And I think it might get better. Because I have faith and I have hope, and that can move mountains.

Today's soundtrack isn't a coincindence, either. It's a song about our numbered days here on earth. "Nations will rise and nations will fall..."

Local Flavor
Soundtrack: “Grace” by Stavesacre

Today while I was browsing the iTunes Music Store trying to figure out what I was going to download for the 15 free songs I have, I couldn't help but notice that The Fray are number 6 on the iTunes most popular songs chart. For those of you not in the know, The Fray are from little old Denver. Not only that, but most of the guys in the band went to High School in Arvada with my friend Ruth. And now they are recieving amazing national attention... number 6 means they're topping acts like The Red Hot Chili Peppers, Lil' Jon, and Panic! At The Disco. I'd say that's pretty good. I'm not a huge fan of their music, but I have to be proud. This is a local band! So go check 'em out if you haven't heard them before... you might just like them.

So far it's been a pretty good year for music, even with all of the poser Nu-Wave bands like the Bravery and Radio 4. If I want to hear New Order and Tears For Fears I'll listen to New Order and Tears For Fears, not some twenty-somethings who were still in diapers when Ian Curtis died. And don't even get me started on the whole retro garage movement that has been going on since The Strokes and The White Stripes blew up a few years ago. For example, there's a few lads from Australia who call themselves Wolfmother... but I liked it better when it was called Led Zeppelin. If you like Led Zeppelin, stick to Led. Wolfmother is just a disappointing clone.

Despite these disappointments within popular music (along with Fall Out Boy, The Used, and All-American Rejects), there is a vast body of good work being produced. Proabably the most anticipated album of this summer is The Eraser from Radiohead frontman Thom Yorke It was totally unexpected, too. Nobody knew Thom Yorke was even doing anything solo, it's release was just announced out of the blue. It couldn't be at a better time, though. Radiohead is on a huge and successful U.S. tour right now with every city selling out in a matter of hours, if not minutes.

Another highly anticipated album that comes out tomorrow is Johnny Cash's American V: A Hundred Highways. It is a collection of the last recordings Johnny Cash made before his death in 2003. As with the rest of his wonderful American Recordings records it is raw, intimate, and intense with emotion. Also of interest is Personal File, which is a collection of songs Johnny Cash recorded from 1973-1982 at his home studio. What is interesting is that these recordings have the same spirit as the American Recordings but his intent was unclear. Despite that, it's an amazing collection of intimate and heartfelt songs that highlight Johnny Cash's amazing heart.

Time for me to go catch up on podcasts... especially NPR's "All Songs Considered". I need to feed the music snob within!

Party Evangelizing!
Soundtrack: “Seven Months” by Portishead

I had a day today. It started at 8 a.m. when Joe woke me up. I had forgotten that today was Habitat For Humanity day. So off we headed to Saudi Aurora, to some neighborhood off in the boonies. Practically Kansas, folks. I think we were near Tower and E-470, but I honestly have no idea if that is where we actually were. We got there just a little after 9 that morning, started working at about 9:30, broke for an hour lunch, and then continued until about 3:30 p.m. And I have to say it was one of the most rewarding things I've ever done. The house was mostly done, we were simply painting and installing electrical. I did my first ever electrical socket and I'm nearly a pro now... if I needed to rewire the house, I probably could! Well, not the whole thing, but at least the outlets.

Afterwards Joe and I grabbed a beer at an English Pub in the area (where we got to see Germany narrowly edge out Argentina) and talked about Genesis. Joe has some exciting ideas that he brought back from his travels in Europe. If everything goes smoothly, I think Genesis will become an amazing body of faith here in our fair city and a great way to reach out to the unchurched. The key to Genesis is being genuine... we’re not handing out tracts, we’re not threatening people with the idea that they are going to burn in Hell, we're not ramming anything down anyone’s throat at all. Instead, it’s party evangelism... showing people that we have a faith but doing so in a laid back atmosphere. Think a bunch of people at a BBQ or a potluck or at a bar and talking about God. That's Genesis in it's simplest form. Because God is about Love and forming relationships with us. Not Hellfire and Brimstone.

As we were talking we both threw out the idea that forming a microbrewery would be a lot of fun. And Joe threw out the idea of putting a little story on the bottles. Each brew would have a different biblical story behind it, such as a German Dunkelbier akin to what Martin Luther would have crafted (yup, he made his own beer) and related to the Reformation. In other words... Devotional beer! Frankly, I think it's genius!

Come to think of it, some of our best brainstorming and idea sharing has been over a nice cold pint. Because as we all know, beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy!

Megathrusters Go!
Soundtrack: Voltron Theme Song

This morning I hit up Ain't It Cool News as I do every day. And what did I see before my eyes? News that Voltron is coming out on DVD! Voltron is by far my favorite cartoon from the 80s, surpassing even He-Man and the Masters of the Universe. So I'm as giddy as a schoolboy right now. I haven't seen the show in ages!

Next week is the Short family reunion and for the first time ever I'm not going to be able to attend. It's a bummer, but these things happen. I will, however, be attending the big Hast family shindig in Platteville at the end of July. We drink a lot of beer and play a lot of horseshoes and volleyball. It's good times.

Fugly Is In
Soundtrack: “Rotten Apple” by Alice In Chains.

While I'm on a design roll, I'd like to say a few words about how overused this whole usability thing is. Web 2.0 is apparently all about a move away from the awkward and graphics-heavy websites of yore. And that's fine with me. But some people are going a little overboard with their claims that good design means all usability and no pretty. In fact, people are claiming that ugly is the best way to go.

And this infuriates me. You don't even know.

Last time I checked, design was defined the following way:
"Graphic Design is a form of visual communication. It is a process in which visual information is given form and structure. This is often done through the arrangement of typography and images and take any form from photography to 3D design. Graphic design can incorporate the use of illustration, iconography, and branding, but is not limited to these devices." That's from Wikipedia.

Meaning that graphic design is about delivering information, but that information isn't restricted to just text or graphics. Good design is something that looks pleasing to the eye while efficiently delivering the content.

The problem is that money drives the Fugly trend, as I like to call it. Google is incredibly ugly, because it was designed by engineers, not designers. Amazon.com and about every other online shopping marketplace is uglier than a monk fish. And then there's MySpace... don't even get me started. These sites are all about marketing and revenue, and that's fine. But there has to be a line drawn somewhere. Consider Cinderblock.com, an online retailer that specializes in music merchandise. It's easily navigable, has a good layout, and a pleasing color scheme. Then you look at Buy.com, and there's so much information to wade through that it makes it incredibly hard to get around the page. Your eye doesn't know where to go, and that's confusing. Confusing is bad, people.

I for one am prone to agree with Andrei Michael Herasimchuk when he says “To think that bad design is actually good design and that good design is not that important in every day life is the epitome of the worst kind of cynical thinking in the web and high-technology industry.” So I offer an ultimatum... why do we have to sacrifice good design for usability? Please, think of us, the people who don't want to get a headache from going to a web site. I'll make my sites usable if you try to make your sites look better. I'm begging you!

Gentlemen, Start Your HTML...
Soundtrack: “Metal” by Nine Inch Nails, “This Fire Burns” by Killswitch Engage, “Wither/Ascend” by Stavesacre

Ladies and Germs, it's time for another installment of “Your Design Sucks!” This week we're examining the web site of web usability guru Jakob Nielsen. Mister Nielsen feels like he's the foremost authority in the field of usability on the web. I think he's just an asshat, but that's me. According to him, the ideal usability system is composed of:

• Learnability (e.g. intuitive navigation)
• Efficiency of use
• Memorability
• Few and noncatastrophic errors
• Subjective satisfaction

Usability considerations are all fine and dandy, but design is not just about usability. In order for there to be learnability and efficiency of use, a good web site, or any design in general must have a well-laid-out grid system to help direct the eye and make it easy to navigate the design. Let's start with his grid. As in the one that is nonexistent. Two colums of tables... apparently Jakob doesn't know that tables are practically obsolete now that we have the wonder of CSS. Thankfully he's not using them the wrong way or nesting or any of that nonsense.Let's talk about color, shall we? Jakob Nielsen is apparently of the school that proclaims that color scheme doesn't mean jack squat. Boy is he ever wrong. The colors on the site aren't garish, but they aren't pleasing. He doesn't adhere to any sort of color theory. The least he could do is give us some subtle complimentary color interplay. Take an art class, Jakob.

Finally, I'd like to once again point out how horrible of a typeface Verdana is. It's a typeface that is sort of in the closet, but everyone can tell how sucky it is. It's a walking identity crisis, too... it's not quite sure if it's a block serif or a sans serif. Poor, poor Verdana. Someone should shoot it and just put it out of it's misery. Although I hate to condone the use of Arial, Jakob's minimalist attempt would be much better if he used a smaller point size and a true sans serif typeface such as Helvetica or Arial. If you want to go minimal, make sure your typeface matches. Especially in the size department... we don't need to see the site from across the room, dude. Make it smaller, and try to do something fun with the title. Please. For the children.

I'm going to try to do this column more often, like once every two weeks or something along those lines. If anyone has a garish or poorly designed site they'd like to pass along for me to rip to shreds and make fun of, please feel free. I think the next one I'm going to do is MySpace. Oh, I'm getting giddy just thinking about it.

Those Wedges Are Cute
Soundtrack: “Kill My Darlings” by Stavesacre

I'm back in the game, people. Yesterday I worked a stagehand call at the Avon Breast Cancer Walk, and it felt great. Even though I'm pretty out of shape right now, I kicked ass and we got everything up in an hour and a half and back down in under an hour. I think I'm going to enjoy the rest of summer, especially if I can get some good calls under my belt. I felt great this morning, too. I didn't oversleep, I felt energetic, and I was happy. Yay.

I've applied to the Apple Store in the Cherry Creek Mall and hopefully I can get an interview. Even though I hate retail I think I might like it if I got a job there. I'd be busy all the time, but if I was able to get a job doing the Genius Bar I would love it. So we'll see how that goes.

I've also been re-evaluating goals and what I want to do once I get my Associate's squared away. I'm not sure I want to stay in Denver at this point. Colorado is always going to be home to me, but there's a lot of appeal in going elsewhere and seeing what the rest of this big world is like. I've been looking at art schools in California, the Seattle area, and on the East Coast as well as schools in Italy, Germany, Australia and England. There are many options and I am excited. No, not excited, giddy. Giddy as a schoolboy. Even though I've already been to Germany, I fell in love with it so much that I would totally go back and live there for a while. The only problem is their unemployment rate, which is around 10% at the moment. England, however, is much better off, as is Australia. Of course, quality of education is the number one thing for me, so I'm aiming high. We'll see how it goes.

Speaking of Australia, Nicole Kidman married country superstar Keith Urban today. It's good she got rid of that creepyTom Cruise and went with someone from her neck of the woods. Good ol' Keith isn't going to make her do some of the crazy stuff that Tom's made Katie do. Hopefully she wises up soon and dumps him. Katie is meant for me, me I tell you!

Pop Culture Is Losing Itself
Soundtrack: “Distance And Meaning” by Converge

Aaron Spelling has gone to the big television production booth in sky. He died earlier this evening from complications resulting from a stroke he had earlier this week. I can't say that I'm too tremedously torn up about it (although Tori Spelling can't leave this mortal realm soon enough in my opinion), it's sad that the man who brought us “Fantasy Island” and "Starsky And Hutch" is no longer with us.

If you're asking who Aaron Spelling is, you've been living under a rock. Mr. Spelling was one of the most prolific and successful television producers ever. Without him we would have no “Beverly Hills 90120”, no “Charlies Angels”, no “Dynasty”. Of course, no “Beverly Hills 90120” is probably a good thing...

I think the real reason this is sad news is because it is another signal that television is going down the crapper. There's no reason to have as many channels as there are, and there's no reason why I should be bored when I have about 50 or 60 of those said channels. There should be something on that I would enjoy, but 75% of the time there isn't. Thankfully I usually watch the tele (as they say in Mother England) in the evening, when there is actually content on that doesn't bore me out of my skull. I wish I got the BBC, because all I'd watch is AbFab and The Office reruns. And Doctor Who. And Red Dwarf. Hell, I'd watch anything on any BBC station because it's bound to be better than what we have here. Except Teletubbies... they freak me the hell out. And I'd want my news from Deutsche Welle. The technology to make your own television channel has to exist... someone's holding out on us, dammit! Because if I could assemble my own mega-channel with all of my favorite shows, I'd be in heaven. Seriously. And don't tell me it's called TiVo, 'cause TiVo just isn't the same.

Gah, this is why I usually buy stuff on DVD.

Oh How I've Missed You So
Soundtrack: "A Bid Farewell" by Killswitch Engage

Two things.

1. The Special Edition version of Killswitch Engage's "Alive Or Just Breathing" is awesome. Seriously.

2. Lik's has a flavor of ice cream made with Guiness. I have not been the same since indulging in said ice cream flavor.

I've been doing some inventory of my personal life and trying to squash some things I'm less than happy with. One of these things is the amount of time I spend on the internet, and so far I'm doing OK. We'll see how it goes. I've also been getting rid of a lot of stuff in my iTunes library. Stuff I haven't listened to since High School. Which is fitting because I'm definitely in no way the same person I was in High School.

I found out earlier today that the pastor of the church I used to attend with my parents here in Denver has been forced to resign for reasons I can't talk about. It was a complete shock. Please send prayers and/or warm fuzzy thoughts to the people of that congregation, it's going to be a tough time for them.